The journey of faith is not a straight smooth path. There are many twists and turns as you go forward in life. Just as life in general is full of mystery, and the unknowns, adding the supernatural into the mix just makes the adventure of life full of surprises. Sometimes, those surprises are a pleasant unexpected blessings, other times they are not so pleasant. Those unexpected detours in life can be challenging and yet be the most productive in your growth as a Child of God.
God never promised an easy life for Christians. Even Jesus had his challenges, his enemies, and those who attacked him even to the point of killing him. Yet in all of this, He was steadfast in forgiving and in love.
One of the main reasons I started this blog was to document the struggles and challenges we endure as we grow in our faith and in our understanding of God. When you first become a believer there is a honeymoon stage where you just love God. You want everyone to know His love and how wonderful he is. Then the challenges come that make you question your faith, what you believe about the character and the personality of God. Those are hard.
All of us at some point will go through this. We all pick up false teachings, or false identities that God needs to break off of us. He doesn’t want us to believe a lie concerning Him. He wants us to know who He really is. He is complex. He is challenging, His ways are not the ways of man. None can fully know Him, even the angels are constantly in wonder and awe with new discoveries daily. The first time I experienced this, I was ANGRY at God. I felt abandoned, betrayed. I was so angry I was determined to walk away from what I knew and just go back to where I had been prior to my being made aware of Holy Spirit. I wanted to be a regular sit in the pew on Sunday Christian and no more. This went on for almost a year. Then as I ventured back to try again, once again, I got slammed with feeling betrayed and abandoned, rejected. Apparently I hadn’t learned my lessons from the first time. I cried a lot of tears. The reality is that I kept coming back to is that my life had no meaning without God in it. I needed him on a level I couldn’t explain. He was so ingrained in who I was that to cut him off was like separating myself from an essential part of myself. I had to accept that I would never understand his ways and that I had to be ok with what He gave me, what he allowed me to see concerning Him.
I wish I could tell you this was the end of that kind of frustration and lesson. However, I must be slow learner, or perhaps God was taking off more layers of misunderstanding. Usually learning to understand another aspect of God that I need to learn. I have found myself going through these similar times in my long journey with God. Right now I am in another one. However, now from experience I can say that I know I will come out of this with a better appreciation for who God is and have a better understanding of who he is and how He likes to do things.
The reason I am writing about this, is because of a conversation I recently had with a family member. She is struggling with an aspect of God that I too struggled with for years. I can’t make it any easier, but I could assure her its a pruning experience that God does. When these things happen so many of us get confused. We react in our frustration and anger. We want to be in control, but when it comes to the things of God, we have No control. He is the boss. If he determines you will be learning something, then you can be sure you will learn it. Fighting against it does you no good. It could delay the wilderness experience. Or you may have to repeat the process until it’s done right.
When I set out to write about my experiences with God, I had intended it to be a book. I got sidelined and haven’t finished the book. But then again, I am not done living either. 🙂 What I decided to do until I feel the motivation to finish the book, is to write on this blog. Some have been specific lessons God has taught me, some pages are poetry he gave me. Some has been me being a mouth piece for God and expressing what I was witnessing happening in our country. Regardless of what I write, it all comes back to God and how he is leading me in any given day. I hope that by reading my experiences, my frustrations, disappointments, that it will encourage you that you are on a path of discovery. Some days will be joy filled, others will have tears. In all of it, God has a plan for your life. The journey is the discovery of life, and most importantly the creator of life. Your walk, your journey, your experiences will be specific to you. You can be sure that God will finish the good work he has begun in you. Enjoy the adventure, enjoy the discovery. Relax. Don’t worry about the results, nor what the end will look like. God will be in your future to greet you as he is in your present to guide you.